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"Gather round, my grandchildren, as I tell you the story of how I once met.... StnMan5. Not Stnman4, or even the superior Stnman3, but Stnman5!"

Indeed Nico I moved down to Eureka Springs, AR from the midwest (Indiana specifically) about a year ago. Dallas is a short 5-6 hour ride for me and we go to Dallas once a year for the IMS CycleWorld Shows for work. Next time I am in town I will drop you a line. We can get a brew and talk film.

Which actually brings me to my new post that will be up in a few. Read and respond if you like.

Well donte you suck. I'm jealous. I've always wanted to meet a celebrity. Not a huge dream or anything. But always thought it would be cool and always had a list of those I would like to meet.
Besides Adam Sandler. You met the guys at the top of my list. I've been listening to KoRn since grade school and they are the only reason I'm not still listening to boy bands and Briteny Spears. The are the single reason for me being the person I am today. Well the biggest contributors anyways. They've been my favorite band for about ten years now and never cease to amaze me. Even when they lose a member. or two. They got Terry Frickin Bozzio to play drums for them!
Anyways. kudos to you man. I'd give my left manmaker for that experience. Especially if it included a full tour of JD's serial killer museum!

Now for my celeb encounters.
First off. This is more of a local celeb. But anybody who listens to KSCS in the metorplex area of TX should know who Hawkeye is. Well if you don't he's a rather popular country dj. Anyways. I used to play for a little league team called the hawkeyes. Guess who sponsored us. The funny thing is. I never really liked baseball. so the two years on the team I never really did anything but sit in the outfield and chase butterflys. So everynow and again my mom calls in for some reason or another and always talks to him on the air and they refer to me as butterfly boy. Wow. Makes me feel special. Way to go mom. Embarrass me on public radio. Yeah, that pretty much sucked. That side of me left when I discovered football. Thank Jeebus for that.

Well. My only other celeb encounter that I can recall happened when I went with my dad to a Hunting expo. Well Tobey Keith just happened to be signing autographs. I got one. And I got him to sign it to my nickname. I don't even like the guy nor his music and he signs this autograph out to cRAzY. Thats frickin amazing. I lauged the rest of the day. Now that I think about. Thats a pretty cool dude. Most celebs would probably be annoyed but he seemed like it didn't bother him.

I worked at a film studio as a grunt for a couple years and I am embarrassed to say that I have seen ALOT of celebrities up close but have not met them:

Paul Giametti--i held a door for him
Tim Burton
Ricky Gervais
Robert Deniro--that was cool
Matt Damon
Brad Pitt
Helena Bonham Carter
Vince Vaughn--blimey he's TALL!
Sienna Miller
Celebrity Dwarves with their manager...lol.
Daniel Craig

That's all I can think of right now. The key is to not look star-struck...doesn't go down well.

I have met..dadada...Roger Moore. Nice chap...

My musician list would be bigger but I didn't have much interest in meeting most of them. I dated a girl who worked at a concert venue and I got to bartend for a few weekends during shows. Then during clean up and after the show some of the bands hung out and drank. I saw probably 30-40 bands in about 2 months, most forgettable bu I did see Manson, Korn, My Life with the Thrill Kill Cult, and a few others I could name if I thought about it. I also saw Dio and man is he old.

Didn't meet Davis (he was being a rockstar and in the bus) but the other guys seemed cool. Fieldy is hilarious.
Slipknot was the same way. Corey (lead singer) was gone but I met the rest of the band and a few of them were great. I also saw a shark give a midget a shot out of a snorkel. Re-read that line and now let me explain.

They call it a Shark Attack. The Tour Manager (Sully I think) dresses in a shark suit and walks around with a funnel attached to a snorkle. A roady follows with a fifth of Jack and a can of coke. They approach you and stand there not saying a word until you drink. There was a midget (bald, tattooed, wearing a shirt that said "333. One Half Evil" and he was great) and he took a shot. Since I was talking to him at the time, I also had to shoot. Yeah that is weird but makes for a great campfire story.

Nico,
They haven't used my interview yet, but it's supposed to be aired any day now. One of the guys I was with has been on the commercials and I've been watching every night for the past three weeks.

Also, yes I was kidding. There's no sarcasm font or I would have used it. Also, it's actually wierd because I do stand-up at an open mic held at a local community college and sometimes I'll be out and people who I've never met but have seen me perform will recognize me and come up to me and say hi. It's a cool feeling, but I really can't get used to it.

Holy Toothpaste Lovely! That's awesome. I would love to work in a film studio.

Alright, so, I didn't actually speak to this person, or even shake his hand. (But I don't think I would have wanted to, given the situation.)

Last year, Ben Stein was scheduled to give a speech at our university on a Wedesday evening, at 7 PM, the time I normally have a rehearsal. I got done with dinner, got to the rehearsal room (located directly behind the auditorium where Ben was set to give his speech), set up my equipment, and decided to go grab a drink and wash my hands quick before rehearsal. So I walked into the bathroom around 6:55, washed my hands, noticed someone's ankles and shoes under the stall, but that's by no means uncommon. When I walked out, there were three people sitting across the hall doing homework, and they gave me strange looks. At first I thought, what, do I have toilet paper stuck to my shoe? And then one of them speaks up: "Do you know who that was in there?"

So, yeah. While washing my hands, I semi-witnessed Ben Stein taking a pre-speech dukie.

Well, it's like the book says. Everyone poops.

That's a really funny story!

Nicodemus wrote:

Sissy Spacek: Very down to earth, very nice. She talked with me for a bit. I sold her fried chicken. A breast and two wings.
Wait... WHO's a breast with two wings? Spacek? Or her friend? I'm confused.

She was bought fried chicken. A chicken breast, and two chicken wings.

lillylovelost wrote:

I got hit on by Gary Coleman at the golf course. It was Easter Sunday and no one was in the place. I am cleaning up the party area in the place. My manager comes over, and says that Gary Coleman is here.

So, I go to the front of the store to hang out with my manager. Gary comes over and starts to talk to us. He says "Are you seeing anyone?", I said "No". He said "What a redhead like you doing single?" I don't respond. He says "You know? I can take you out for a nice steak dinner." I said "No, that's okay". I look to my manager to help me get out of the situation. He says to Gary "She's a vegetarian". Gary says "Well, I know a place with great Cajun Catfish". I tell him "No, thanks".

After that, everyone at work knows what happened and I was called Coley or Mrs. Coleman for about 9 months.

Well, you don't have to worry about that any more, because someone has taken the title. Fresh off the press:http://www.hollywood.com/news/Gary_Coleman_Weds/5071880

There is a new Mrs. Coleman. Not that anyone would care. I know I don't care.

The main reason I am bringing up your post is that when I first read it, the last name Coleman didn't register, so I kept thinking Gary Cole was hitting on you. All I could think of was Bill Lumbarg hitting on somebody.

"Yeaaaaaaaah, can you move a little to the right. Yeaaaaaaaah, you are looking very sexy. Now, I think you should put your number on the back of this PTS report. Yeaaaaah, that's be great."

It was just such a revolting, yet strangely hilarious picture going on in my head. Although, that is a pretty good description for anything that pops in my head.

Anywho, that's all.

Some responses / comments...

lilly:

I worked at an indoor glow in the dark mini golf course...

Hey, I want one of those!

I've met...Jamie Lee Curtis...

I met her at a book signing for Today I Feel Silly back when I was a manager for Barnes & Noble. Wow... I don't get starstruck often, but I sure did with her. I was breathless, a-twitter, absolutely gobsmacked. And she was SO funny, SO down-to-earth, SO self-deprecating, SO polite and good-natured and fun. She showed up early, and I was short-staffed (a frequent occurence in retail), and she insisted on helping set up for her own book signing! She, like, helped set out the chairs, filled her own water pitcher, and although she was only booked for ninety minutes, ended up staying for four or five hours, chatting with each and every person that wanted to meet her and finally taking the entire "closing" staff over to the café and buying Starbucks for all the employees. What an absolutely awesome lady. And... she's a "Lady"! Fergie (not the Black Eyed Peas singer), take notes.

Cameron Crowe rented out the store for a day.

Now, there's a guy I'd like to meet and chat with over coffee. I rather suspect I'd be fairly light-headed in his presence, too. One of the best writers of natural, yet profound dialogue in the business, if not THE best.

I got hit on by Gary Coleman at the golf course... He said "[What's] a redhead like you doing single?" I don't respond.

It's a good thing I'm not a chick, because I might have responded with something on the order of, What's a grown man like you doing so short? Man, but he's a persistent little bugger. (Well, he is.) Looks like he finally snagged a redhead... Glad you took evasive manuevers, it looks like he has a short fuse, too. (Pun and double entendre very much intended.)

...He says to Gary "She's a vegetarian". Gary says "Well, I know a place with great Cajun Catfish".

[Laughing] What, does he think fish grow on trees? Moron.

After that, everyone at work knows what happened and I was called Coley or Mrs. Coleman for about 9 months.

Better than Mrs. Webster, I suppose...

[Aside: I'm watching Dennis Miller, one of my personal most favorite people in the whole, wide world, on television, and he just said this about Hillary (not Rodham) Clinton: "This woman has been cheated on more than a blind woman playing Scrabble with gypsies." SNARK!!! Oh, Heavens, that's good.]

The following I sat at P.F. Chang's as a host: ...Bob Saget, and Sissy Spacek.

Another Sissy Spacek sighting! And, Saget's a perv.

I auditioned for 1 vs. 100...

Cool.

...[A]nd was in one of the final groups...

Très cool.

...[A]nd got to play the game...

Über cool!

...Bob... is a very, very dirty man.

Current star of America's Dirtiest Standup Videos.

Probably the biggest celebrity I've met was Harold Pinter. I was pretty damn nervous, considering I consider him to be the greatest living playwright.

A few years ago, when I was employed by the University of Dallas -- about the same time as I met Ian McKellen -- Pinter came and spoke at a literature symposium. I never got to meet the man one-on-one, but he struck me as being incredibly world-weary, though, of course, witty, wry and erudite to the point of being almost superhuman.

I interviewed Neil Jordan for about an hour a while back. He's not the kind of guy you feel comfortable around.

He seems an odd duck, all right, but although he's had as many failures as successes, I do have to applaud his willingness to take risks. Even the greatest artists -- in any medium -- have their missteps. Arguably, the greater the talent, the greater his/her disasters.

I was once given the opportunity to interview Face from [T]he A-Team. I said no, as I wouldn't know what to say.

You had the chance to sit down with THE ORIGINAL STARBUCK, and COULDN'T THINK OF ANYTHING TO SAY? Where are my blood pressure pills?

I regret my decision.

Well, okay, then.

On Saturday I'm going to a Q and A with Daniel Day Lewis and PTA, but I can't think of anything to ask him.

I quite simply don't know what to say to that. Are you SURE you're a fan of filmed entertainment?

Six:

"Gather round, my grandchildren, as I tell you the story of how I once met.... StnMan5. Not Stnman4, or even the superior Stnman3, but Stnman5!"

[Chuckle] Shades of Logan's Run, not to mention, The Matrix Reloaded: You know, your predecessors had much more respect!

Donte:

Nico... Dallas is a short 5-6 hour ride for me...we go to Dallas once a year... Next time I am in town I will drop you a line. We can get a brew and talk film.

Sounds good, I think I've had my last brewski, but we can certainly meet somewhere to shoot the breeze and have a quick bite. Erm.

cRAzY:

Well [D]onte you suck. I'm jealous. I've always wanted to meet a celebrity.

You know, YOU can meet me, TOO, you know, cRAzY. Oh. Wait. Nevermind.

...[A]nybody who listens to KSCS in the metorplex area of TX should know who Hawkeye is.

I know who he is, but, sorry, I don't. I like some country, all right, but I don't like country / western radio stations. I'm more a ESPN 103.3 (esp. Dale Hansen and Galloway & Co., not to mention Mike & Mike In the Morning), 1080, 570 and 720 AM kind of guy. Though I do listen to NPR (90.1) and WRR (101.1) pretty regularly.

I never really liked baseball. [S]o the two years on the team I never really did anything but sit in the outfield and chase butterflys.

I never knew you played for the Rangers.

Lovely:

Paul Giamatti... Ricky Gervais... Robert De Niro... Matt Damon... Brad Pitt... Helena Bonham Carter... Daniel Craig...

I'm actually geeking out here a bit.

Celebrity Dwarves with their manager...

Just when I thought it couldn't get any better...

I have met..dadada...Roger Moore. Nice chap...

Loved him in those old Easy-Off Oven Cleaner commercials.

Donte, again:

I also saw Dio and man is he old.

[Grumble] Youth is wasted on the young.

I also saw a shark give a midget a shot out of a snorkel.

It's like watching a drunk attempt to employ a Magnetic Poetry Kit.

StnMan (Hey, he's not mad at me!):

They haven't used my interview yet, but it's supposed to be aired any day now.

Make sure it gets onto YouTube.

...I do stand-up at an open mic held at a local community college and sometimes I'll be out and people who I've never met but have seen me perform will recognize me and come up to me and say hi. It's a cool feeling, but I really can't get used to it.

[Nodding] Been there. To earn extra coin when I was an undergrad, I did a gig at the one local bar and grill which held a regular comedy night (Mondays), for about eight months. Damn, that was tough. I had to come up with new material every week, and after a month or so I was spending twice the amount of time writing, editing and practicing stand-up, that I was on deejaying / programming or Student Council, not to mention, of course, actual assigned schoolwork. And that was for just a fifteen-minute set. (Problem was, it was the same damn crowd every week, so I couldn't get away with re-using or even tweaking old routines. Plus, I wasn't nearly as creative, consistently I mean, as I thought I was.) It was decent money, a percentage of the door (split between all the acts, which was, like, eight), but it just wiped me the Hell out, and killed forever any ambitions I might have had to do it for-real, like, as a career. I have ENORMOUS[/u] respect for consistently working comedians. That most definitely includes improvisational comedy troupers, 'cause I tried doing [b]that, too, and, well, I really, really sucked. (Especially at the "five-minute movie" routine, which was a real gut-check moment in the life of yours truly...)

As for beng recognized, yeah, that's pretty cool for about a week, and then it becomes a real pain in the ass. Getting accosted by enthusiastic would-be content / career advisors while you're trying to hump it across campus in the ten minutes you have in between classes, or when you're on the way to work, or, even worse, when you're trying to LEAVE work, or when you're trying to chillax, or study, or... Well, you get the idea. Again, I refer to Tom Hanks in The Simpsons Movie: "If you see me in person, please, leave me be."

Jack0:

That's awesome. I would love to work in a film studio.

I'd love to own one. (I'd settle for merely running one, though.)

dranscht:

While washing my hands, I semi-witnessed Ben Stein taking a pre-speech dukie.

Yeah, he always seemed pretty pinched to me.

StnMan redux:

...[It's] like the book says. Everyone poops.

For some strange reason, ever since I first saw that book, I've remembered it as "EveryBODY Poops". And it's totally made it impossible for me to listen to a certain R.E.M. song without grinning and chuckling, and making up strange, Weird Al-esque lyrics about potty training and the finer points of essential bodily functions to it.

mooreland:

Sissy Spacek: Very down to earth, very nice. She talked with me for a bit. I sold her fried chicken. A breast and two wings.

Wait... WHO's a breast with two wings? Spacek? Or her friend? I'm confused.

She was bought fried chicken. A chicken breast, and two chicken wings.

[SIIIIGGGGHHHHHHHH...] I. Know.

...[W]hen I first read [lilly's post]it, the last name Coleman didn't register, so I kept thinking Gary Cole was hitting on you. All I could think of was Bill [Lumbergh] hitting on somebody.

"Yeaaaaaaaah, can you move a little to the right. Yeaaaaaaaah, you are looking very sexy. ...Yeaaaaah, that's be great."

SO wrong.

You're so good at that impression, it's scary, btw, mooreland.

It was just such a revolting, yet strangely hilarious picture going on in my head. Although, that is a pretty good description for anything that pops in my head.

And The Oracle points to the sign over her kitchen doorway: Nosce Te Ipsum. And bakes some cookies, and chain-smokes some more, and says "damn." A lot.

I remain, as always...

Nico.

Nico, you geek...

Yeah, when I saw Deniro he was heading for his Mercedes but still "in character" for the role he was playing. It was awe inspiring, really, to see a master at his craft. This is going to sound geeky, but it was kind of a life-altering experience...lame, I know.

When I first moved to New York I saw Dennis Leary and Chris Noth at a bar. I was standing right next to them while trying to order and the whole time this drunk college guy kept gushing about how much he loved Dennis. It was pretty cool, especially since I wasn't the one gushing. Over the years I've seen Chris Noth in the neighborhood a few times. One night he was talking to this girl on the street, doing the "lean" (you know, with one hand on the wall behind her so his face is a few inches from hers). That was cool because it was obvious he was doing something you only see on screen and never in real life.

The same year I saw David Krumholtz while they were filming Sidewalks of New York two buildings over from my dorm. He was smoking a cigarette on our stoop and I "recognized" him instantly, but since he was standing in front of my dorm I thought I must know him from school. So I gave him a nod like "hey what's us dude" and he smiled and nodded back. It wasn't till I saw Heather Graham and Brittany Murphy that I realized who he was.

In the same neighborhood I used to pass John Stewart regularly while he was walking to his morning coffee shop. Exchanged nods with him, too.

Once I was waiting for an elevator in court and right next to me was Rosie O'Donnell. (If you ever see file footage of her on the news wearing this bright lime green shirt, it was that day.) Not being a huge fan, to say the least, I could not think of a single thing to say. Finally she looked at me and said "hello." Don't know how that one escaped me.

The very coolest, though, was about five or six years ago at this bar called Siberia near Port Authority. We used to see Jimmy Fallon there all the time. One got the impression he was "slumming" for fans to fall over him. Don't know if that was the case or not (I mean, I loved the slum factor of the place myself), but he was always cool. One night we were downstairs with about 10 or 15 people total -- four of them being my friends and three of them being Jimmy Fallon, Will Ferrell and Horatio Sanz. Will and Horatio were standing by the bar guarding a case of beer that they either brought with them or bought upstairs. Jimmy was going around offering people beer. He offered some to us, but we all had full beers at the time.

When we finished our beers we went up to him (I was chosen to do all the talking) to take him up on his offer. He was chatting up a girl, so I told Will Ferrell that Jimmy had offered us some beers. Will was not nearly as "warm" as Jimmy to say the least, but I guess I would be a little annoyed, too, if I agreed to go out with a friend and then get dragged to this dump across the street from Port Authority where I end up guarding the beer while my friend chats up whatever kind of girls go to bars across the street from Port Authority. So Will says "You gotta ask Jimmy," so we kind of stand there waiting for Jimmy to stop talking to the girl, feeling more and more like idiots the whole time. When Jimmy turns to us, I say something like "Yeah so you offered us some beers and, you know, we were kind of like we would like some of those beers because we'd be idiots to not take you up on the offer" and he says "yeah you would be idiots." Then he shook my hand and asked Will to give us each a beer. It was very cool. The next time I saw him there I was going to try to hang out with him but my fiancee (now wife) had too much to drink so we had to go.

I also saw one of the medical examiners from Law & Order at that bar on her birthday. Got a hug from her.

Well donte, Davis is sober now. Praise Jeebus

.(or so he says......)

Slipknot seems like a pretty cool band to meet. Those guys know how to put on an effin show.

As for Nico. Oh Nico. I know I sound like a broken record. But man you never cease to crack me up. Guess I should be expecting it by now. But I never do. And thats the beauty of it.

bennettarthur wrote:

The very coolest, though, was about five or six years ago at this bar called Siberia near Port Authority. We used to see Jimmy Fallon there all the time. One got the impression he was "slumming" for fans to fall over him. Don't know if that was the case or not (I mean, I loved the slum factor of the place myself), but he was always cool. One night we were downstairs with about 10 or 15 people total -- four of them being my friends and three of them being Jimmy Fallon, Will Ferrell and Horatio Sanz. Will and Horatio were standing by the bar guarding a case of beer that they either brought with them or bought upstairs. Jimmy was going around offering people beer. He offered some to us, but we all had full beers at the time.

When we finished our beers we went up to him (I was chosen to do all the talking) to take him up on his offer. He was chatting up a girl, so I told Will Ferrell that Jimmy had offered us some beers. Will was not nearly as "warm" as Jimmy to say the least, but I guess I would be a little annoyed, too, if I agreed to go out with a friend and then get dragged to this dump across the street from Port Authority where I end up guarding the beer while my friend chats up whatever kind of girls go to bars across the street from Port Authority. So Will says "You gotta ask Jimmy," so we kind of stand there waiting for Jimmy to stop talking to the girl, feeling more and more like idiots the whole time. When Jimmy turns to us, I say something like "Yeah so you offered us some beers and, you know, we were kind of like we would like some of those beers because we'd be idiots to not take you up on the offer" and he says "yeah you would be idiots." Then he shook my hand and asked Will to give us each a beer. It was very cool. The next time I saw him there I was going to try to hang out with him but my fiancee (now wife) had too much to drink so we had to go.

Oh my god. That would not have been good for me. I would have been so excited that I would have lost all bodily control of myself. I would have started screaming like a little girl, I would have pissed myself, it would not have been good. To me, your story is the ultimate of the celebrity encounters (with the possible exception of lilly's getting hit on by Gary Coleman cause that is hilarious) and I am extordinarily jealous of you.

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